Remember

Dear Self,

Remember. Remember that everything in life happens for a reason. Remember that there is something to be grateful for every day. Remember that this life is a gift and that decisions determine our destiny.

During our sacrament meeting yesterday good friends of ours spoke and shared some important messages. The focus of one of the talks was to remember. To record your life to share with our family, friends, and those who will only learn about us from the things we make record of. He said to make time to remember the details of this life and to recognize the hand of God in each day. It had me thinking about my present time and how sometimes all I can think about is the future and I spend so much time focusing on the future that I tend to push aside my present. My children especially. I think about when they are older, when they can get themselves dressed or for heavens sake, wipe their own bums!

I want to always remember them as they are right now. I want to remember how much they need me and how much they are learning. I want to remember the way they say "I love you, see you soon" over and over and over to the point of tears whenever I leave the house for a meeting or a quick outing. I want to remember how much they trust me and turn to me for every.little.thing! I spend to much time getting frustrated with them for things they have no control over. I need to remember they are little, and that they will only be this way once. I need to spend my time comforting and encouraging them. I have my good days, but lately I feel like they are few and far between.

Remember Bostyn, how she likes to be in charge and loves to be vocally recognized. She is very good at making you do exactly what she wants and her pouty look can get her just about anything she wants! Remember her lisp and all the conversations we have together and all the emotion she shows in her face when she is telling stories! Remember her contagious laugh and her one-dimpled smile. Her big blue eyes and her tiny little nose. Her love for all things pink and princess. The next time she asks me to paint her nails and toes I hope I can remember to take five minutes to bond with her and remind her there is nothing in this world I wouldn't do for her.

Remember Madden, what a sweet and sensitive boy he is and I hope always will be. He wants to be just like his dad and wants to be the best at everything. He is protective and so loving. Remember his brown eyes and how he searches your face for direction and comfort. Remember how he plays with my hair every time he is nervous and the way he makes a hmmm noise whenever he is embarrassed! I need to remember how sensitive he is and how much it hurts his feelings whenever he thinks I am disappointed in him. I hope I can always remember to teach him to do his best and that will always be enough.

Remember Breckyn, what a sweet child she is. I want to remember every detail about her! I want to always remember the day she was born and the way my life changed that day because of her. She is so very special and so needed. I need to remember how quickly she will grow and how I need to cherish every minute with her. Remember  her smile and how from the moment you walk into her room each morning she is full of joy and love. How her smile brightens every morning! Remember the way she loves her Dad and how he is the one who can always make her laugh and the second she sees him her whole body smiles and wiggles! Remember the way she stares when I feed her and how each time I look down at her she is already looking up at me. I need to remember to put my phone down while I feed her and just enjoy each moment with her. Remember how she loves to be cuddled and at the same time how much she loves her own space! I hope the next time she is fussing I can hold her and comfort her instead of giving her her binkie and walking away.

Remember how very blessed I am and always have been.