"A final gospel truth that will contribute to our understanding of and hence the quality of our marriages relates to the degree in which we involve the Savior in our relationships as husbands and wives. As designed by our Heavenly Father, marriage consists of our first entering into a covenant relationship with Christ and then with each other. He and his teachings must be the focal point of our togetherness. As we become more like him and grow closer to him, we will naturally become more loving and grow closer to each other"

Monday, July 14, 2014


Dear Self,

Remember. Remember that everything in life happens for a reason. Remember that there is something to be grateful for every day. Remember that this life is a gift and that decisions determine our destiny.

During our sacrament meeting yesterday good friends of ours spoke and shared some important messages. The focus of one of the talks was to remember. To record your life to share with our family, friends, and those who will only learn about us from the things we make record of. He said to make time to remember the details of this life and to recognize the hand of God in each day. It had me thinking about my present time and how sometimes all I can think about is the future and I spend so much time focusing on the future that I tend to push aside my present. My children especially. I think about when they are older, when they can get themselves dressed or for heavens sake, wipe their own bums!

I want to always remember them as they are right now. I want to remember how much they need me and how much they are learning. I want to remember the way they say "I love you, see you soon" over and over and over to the point of tears whenever I leave the house for a meeting or a quick outing. I want to remember how much they trust me and turn to me for every.little.thing! I spend to much time getting frustrated with them for things they have no control over. I need to remember they are little, and that they will only be this way once. I need to spend my time comforting and encouraging them. I have my good days, but lately I feel like they are few and far between.

Remember Bostyn, how she likes to be in charge and loves to be vocally recognized. She is very good at making you do exactly what she wants and her pouty look can get her just about anything she wants! Remember her lisp and all the conversations we have together and all the emotion she shows in her face when she is telling stories! Remember her contagious laugh and her one-dimpled smile. Her big blue eyes and her tiny little nose. Her love for all things pink and princess. The next time she asks me to paint her nails and toes I hope I can remember to take five minutes to bond with her and remind her there is nothing in this world I wouldn't do for her.

Remember Madden, what a sweet and sensitive boy he is and I hope always will be. He wants to be just like his dad and wants to be the best at everything. He is protective and so loving. Remember his brown eyes and how he searches your face for direction and comfort. Remember how he plays with my hair every time he is nervous and the way he makes a hmmm noise whenever he is embarrassed! I need to remember how sensitive he is and how much it hurts his feelings whenever he thinks I am disappointed in him. I hope I can always remember to teach him to do his best and that will always be enough.

Remember Breckyn, what a sweet child she is. I want to remember every detail about her! I want to always remember the day she was born and the way my life changed that day because of her. She is so very special and so needed. I need to remember how quickly she will grow and how I need to cherish every minute with her. Remember  her smile and how from the moment you walk into her room each morning she is full of joy and love. How her smile brightens every morning! Remember the way she loves her Dad and how he is the one who can always make her laugh and the second she sees him her whole body smiles and wiggles! Remember the way she stares when I feed her and how each time I look down at her she is already looking up at me. I need to remember to put my phone down while I feed her and just enjoy each moment with her. Remember how she loves to be cuddled and at the same time how much she loves her own space! I hope the next time she is fussing I can hold her and comfort her instead of giving her her binkie and walking away.

Remember how very blessed I am and always have been.

Sunday, July 6, 2014

Dear Madden...

I'm not much of a journal writer. I wish I was, but I've started 20+ journals in my life and don't think I have ever made it past entry #5 so I turned to blogging. Once again. I'm not much of a blogger! I enjoy reading other blogs and stalk frequently ;) I have great intentions of keeping this updated for my family but I fail! And I'm not even sure much of our family sees this anyway. So I'm turning it into letters for my children and husband. If my intentions are to print this "letter-blog" one day do I need to make a different blog or can I choose to print from this post on? Anyone know? Anyway.... I've felt like this is something I need to do for my family and a way for me to remember the little things and the silly things my kids do and say. So I'm going to start with today. 

Dear Madden, 

You touched my heart today, as you often do. You have had such a passion and love for the church and our Lord since you started going to nursery. You are always the one to tell me in detail what you learned in class and exactly what songs you sang and what picture you colored. You are always telling me that things we do and say make Jesus very happy, and sometimes you tell us that things we are doing and saying make Jesus very sad! 

Today was fast and testimony meeting and you have been asking you bare your testimony for months. I always told you that you are to little and that when you grow bigger you can have a turn! Today I changed my mind. I wanted to set and example for you, but that was after you set an example to me. The congregation was silent. Minutes were passing by with no one getting up to bare testimony. You whispered to me, "Why is no one talking, we aren't supposed to take breaks!" My heart melted in that moment so I asked if you wanted to go up there! You very excitedly agreed and we practiced a few words from our seats. Once you felt ready we walked up to the front. And you must know how much I love you to go up there with you! It's not an easy thing for me and truthfully I'm grateful to you for giving me the courage. 

We got to the pulpit and you quickly changed your mind so I told you to sit and that I would go first. You sat on my lap after I was done and we waited until you were ready. You looked into my eyes for guidance while you played with my hair and earrings like you always do whenever you get nervous. You quietly told me you were ready for your turn so we stood and tried it again! You got nervous again so I helped say a few words for you like we had practiced and we went back to our seats. We got back to Dad and Bostyn and you were immediately sad that you didn't do it by yourself and asked if you could go back up! 

What an example you were to me today son. A reminder that there should never be a quiet testimony meeting because we all have much to be thankful for and should always take those opportunities to publicly thank our Father in Heaven. You were an example of courage and faith and I am so very proud of you. I pray you always carry those qualities with you and that you are always brave and always have a desire to share what you believe. You have blessed my life more than you will ever know or understand. The things you say to me and not things all three year olds say. You are a very special boy and I love you just the way you are. Keep being my inspiration Tracer-Boy... I need it more than ever! 

Love, Mom